Motherhood and homeschooling proved to be fertile ground for overeating. I yearned to leave the house, but it would be nap time. When driving in town, I traded my frustrations for fast food or coffee drinks. I worried my son would think driving in a car, leaving an office, or a trip home from the grocery store equaled drive thru purchases of fast food or snacks eaten in the car. Sometimes I waited until my husband was home then rushed to the McDonald’s parking lot to eat two small burgers, a small fry, and a drink. My son was my mirror for my behaviour. His requests to stop and eat somewhere versus when it would not cross his mind were a reflection on my habits. If he could make those mental shifts based on my habits, surely I could too. But, what did I need to make that shift? Where was my parent controlling what I ate? Where was the mother for the mother? No one. because I was too old for a mother to monitor my food and to stubborn to listen. It was up to me. How could I muster up the will to change? What needed to happen for me, not my friends and not other moms, that would make my life sweeter so sugary drinks would lose their grip?
I needed reconnection with the part of me that loved learning. Whether taking time learning music, trying a recipe or sitting at a cafe reading and writing – I needed learning and creating in my life. Motherhood didn’t take away the woman I am and my love for these things. I neglected a part of myself, and the consequences of doing so were unavoidable.
I honored how much time I needed to replenish this empty cup. I released guilt and expectations of what it “should” look like, and that includes homeschooling. Homeschooling for me isn’t about entertaining my son from 8-2pm, like a school day. I thought about the kind of child care I wanted for him and after some time, it appeared. I happily enjoy my work while he learns about Minecraft with a group of mixed aged children. He loves this time as evidenced by his various aged friends, constant reading and researching on how to create things in Minecraft. It is not unlike what I have done for myself. Academic and lesiure learning happens around our family schedule, not to copy anyone else and not around one person. I looked at our family as a whole with each person needing space for their individual needs.
When I honored time I needed to plug into my dreams, I turned around to see that my husband and son were flourishing. Any perceived gaps I thought I created became filled with bonding beyond my expectations. My son found a sibling family and my husband joined a gym because he missed his former weight routine. All I needed to create the life I desired was a willingness to try – to step forward – and ignore any naysayers or judgmental voices of how homeschooling and weight loss should appear.
Homeschooling and Peaceful Weight Loss coexist. Do you feel stuck in your motherhood? Are you overeating that stress? Ask yourself the right questions and listen to the guidance you receive – even if in a small way. You are the change.
As a coach, I hear women call themselves lazy and undisciplined. They lament the lack of time they exercise and cook healthy meals. Where money travels indicates your values so don’t apologize for how your spend your money.
When living in an area of high value, life feels right and the purchases we make feel right. When we spend money on something we don’t hold in high esteem, it hurts to write that check. We create buyer’s remorse.
Admitting that weight loss isn’t important to you doesn’t make you lazy. It means weight loss efforts trump another area of life. When my father battled lung cancer weight loss was not important to me. I treaded water, investing no money on weight loss or learning new recipes. Instead, I spent money traveling to see my father, sending him food items, books, and spending time with on the phone while he received chemotherapy. I look back with gratitude for every dollar, and I spent on that value. I do not see myself as lazy because I didn’t lose weight at that time.
If you love fashion, set aside that money and enjoy it! It took me some time to embrace my love of wearing beautiful clothing. If you love providing your children with the best books, then make a plan to create that in your budget. When weight loss education seems nice but you would rather purchase a nice dress for work – honor that. If you want to learn how to raise weight loss to a higher value so you can honor it more, I can help with that. The areas of life where you spend money indicate your bigger mission and purpose. How can weight loss improve, enhance, or accelerate the areas of life you already value?
Be kind to yourself. There are magnificent reasons why we overeat. When you are ready to learn, the teacher will appear. And the song for today’s post is Steal My Girl by One Direction. Cheesy? Maybe. My take away is appreciating your own beauty today!
Hang around the teacher’s lounge long enough and you will hear tales of lazy, undisciplined children. In the same way, coaches will complain their clients aren’t ready to do the work or are unfocused. In both cases, neither is forcing us to look at ourselves. We assume the perceived problem is with the other person.
And you need to know that the reason you don’t do what these coaches suggest is because it’s not aligning to your values. So you are labeled lazy, undisciplined, not driven. You are given these labels instead of realizing that you’re self defeating because what they suggest is not congruent with your values. And so you go to different consultants until you finally find the one who matches, whose values are aligned with yours.
Dr. John Demartini, http://blog.drdemartini.com/look-seeking-mentor-coach/
Some examples of misalignment of values could be
* a strict, religious, school expecting the out of the box thinker to conform without strife.
* a client who values long, thoughtful answers as opposed to quick responses.
* teaching a student from a Cajun music family classical music when she wants to play in her family band.
Sometimes we learn from trial and error, and that is okay. Sometimes it is in the learning of what we don’t value that we realize what we do. This is why my coaching system includes a tool for determining what you value and it may not be what you think it is. I never moved forward as much as when I stopped focusing on my problems and shifted to what I valued most and how to align my life to do more of it.
My son sings this song and the message reminds me what is possible when we embrace who we are, not putting ourselves above or below another.
“Never letting go
Gotta learn to go
Watch me as I touch the sky
Still I fly”
One way I treated myself as a queen was breakfast! I’ve always loved a hearty breakfast and I still enjoy one to this day! The ingredients have changed but the warm, southern flavors still remain. I am worth the time it takes for a great breakfast. I don’t feel that way about dinner. For dinner I could eat a bowl of cereal.
You are worth taking the time to find ways to enjoy and love your life!
What is one way you will enjoy your life this week?
The title I chose for this piece has a story behind it. I have been noticing the connection between what I eat and how I feel. The added benefit was that as I became more present with what I ate, my spiritual connection increased. I began to feel full inside, as feelings of calm, peacefulness and even joy began emerging. When I felt this connected and centered, I felt abundant in many ways and did not need all the excess comfort food. Life feels more beautiful when connected to the simple abundance available to us all. Rozanne Henry, Artist
What is your spiritual quest? What brings you meaning? What do you want in return for your service?
What are you doing right now that you love enough to eat in a way that fuels you do to more of it?
These are big questions. Need help with answers? Drop me a line or take out a notebook and start writing.
When I started my weight loss journey of healing I could not see where I would be today – doing what I am doing. Trust. Trust that there is more for you and as you are ready, it will reveal itself. Here are some affirmations and words of power to get you going.
Record your inspirations and act on them.
I am humble, I am a disciple, and I listen to my soul.
I am an expression of the divinity, and I honor myself.
Oh how I love combining what I eat with what I do in between meal time! Soul Cake are two words that fit together perfectly! We are living a life so sweet, full of soul and our heart’s desire that it really is like Soul Cake!
A big key to feeling great is taking charge of your food when away from home. Before heading out for the day, I show you what I bring with me. I bring more food than I need so I always in case I am stuck in town.
If you are interested in the recipes for my snacks head over to the Protective Diet website.
What’s in your power bag?
A power bag gives me:
- clear thinking
- no bloating or feeling “fat”
- more energy the next day
- good sleep at night
- more energy to do more work I love!
Oh, I could write an entire book on the highs and lows of plans I have bought along the way. The good news is I learned so much! But on the other hand, I am reminded of this quote by Mark Twain, “Be careful about reading health books, you may die of a misprint.”
What foods have you have taken on or left out as you have gone through your life?
Tell me all about it here on on my facebook page, The Peaceful Weight Loss Coach.
I saw a lady in the Greek buffet I perceived to be checking out of life. She was overweight and sat close to the buffet with her phone in one hand, a magazine in her lap, and two plates of fried food.
We either eat our dreams or live them. We either step into our lives or we feast on fried food and the agendas of others. It’s easier to read about the lives of others than to open my mind and heart to the plate of life.
In my own life, I moved out of that space slowly. My mind and heart don’t always work as one. I want to be “that person” who could get by with a healthy meal for my body, but the next thing I knew – I was overeating. Will power was never enough. The only thing that made shifting peaceful was allowing myself the desire for more of life. I gave my eyes a chance to blink gently into how my family, work, and physical body could change. Sometimes just thinking bigger was so overwhelming that I shut in down and became the lady at the restaurant table ordering item after item.
I never moved so slowly as when I spent hours with therapists talking about food. I never moved so fast as when I focused on what I wanted out of life and found mentors and coaches that held space for me to take the next steps. I’m not saying all therapy is bad – I am only speaking from my experience. Until I shifted my focus complaining about what others had done to me instead of how they came to strengthen me for more major changes stood at a standstill.
Is there an area of your life where you are eating your dreams? Avoiding success? Fear of failure? Wondering what will people think?
What is one aspect of your life that could use a tiny step forward? Tell me about it. I want to know. Share here or on my Facebook page, The Peaceful Weight Loss Coach.
Have you heard my seven minute free meditation, Centering Around Overeating? It’s yours here.